Karen, I’m so sorry you’re going through this rough time. It’s taken me nearly twelve years to be able to do this after a similar loss, and yes, it is a rollercoaster ride even after all this time, as I unearth memories of when I first moved in and remarried, took care of him when he was sick, and found a new way of living solo.

I absolutely hate sympathy cards, and instead of giving them to friends dealing with a loss, I give pretty journals with pretty pens, so when they are ready, they can begin planning for a different kind of life. It’s hard to change your plans to reflect a different lifestyle, but as you process the grief and hold on to happy memories, you design something new. It’s not fun or easy in the beginning, but eventually, you’ll rediscover a new kind of richness and find your way, different, but still good.

My husband still turns on our bedroom light from time to time, especially when I’m struggling for some reason, I think just to remind me he’s still around, watching over me. Your partner is, without a single doubt, still watching over you, too. The love you shared is still very much alive, even if your person isn’t with you in the same way. Love just doesn’t die, and we don’t either, really. The Angels say for the one who crosses over, it’s a happy time, a return to home, and the things that made your person special and unique, their essence, live still.

Please know I’m thinking of you and sending you loving energy. Life will change for you, but it can still be good. Many, many hugs and blessings to you, my friend.